“I grew up in a Christian home” pretty cliche, right?

Well, I did. I grew up in a Christian home, with parents who loved me very much, who raised me to be kind and hardworking, taught me about Jesus, and modeled what it is like to live for Him.I never lead a double life, and never craved rebellion. Following rules was part of my nature–discipline and independence were traits that I had strived for.

Even though there were still many places I desperately needed to grow in, I think I had a pretty good relationship with God. I wanted to glorify Him. He was a source of comfort to me, and I could feel His presence in my life. However, I don’t think I fully understood the implications of the Gospel until I came to college.

When I went to college, I joined Cru, and proceeded to grow in my faith and understanding of the Gospel’s implications. While I have continued to work through many hiccups along the way, such as doubt and legalism, that’s basically it.

So why am I telling you this?

I’m telling you this because every single day, I still need Jesus. No matter how outwardly disciplined I am, I will always fall short. No matter how “together” I feel like I am on the outside, there are so many inward sins that I need to work through (like pride, jealousy, and legalism), sins that can only be wiped clean by the sacrifice and mercy of our loving Father and His Son.

Jesus came to this earth and died for me. He died for you as well. We are all equally guilty of the sin that separates us from God. Discipline cannot make me any more loved by my creator, and a lack of discipline cannot make me any less loved. Acceptance of Jesus’s sacrifice and mercy on us is the only thing that marks us blameless in His sight–beautiful, beloved and cherished children of God. It is in that hope that I find truth to cling to, not the hope in my own discipline and “good works” which will inevitably fail me, but in the hope of true redemption through my loving Father.