God has worked in many mysterious ways throughout my life, and as I sit here reflecting on my journey to find Christ, I want to thank Him for the most recent challenges He has faced me with.

I grew up in the little town of Cambria, WI where I had a loving, Christian family and community. I was familiar with who God was and regularly went to church, but never really felt a strong connection with Him. I found all my happiness in my friends, family, hobbies, and long-term relationship. Growing up, I was thankful for all these great things and thought that they were what defined my purpose and fulfilled my entire life. While all these things gave me a lot of happiness, I still felt I was searching for something that sparked a fire inside my heart.

When I came to college in the fall of 2016, I had an open heart and an open mind, excited to take on this new journey. I experienced being a part of collegiate athletics, explored the college party scene, and tried to take advantage of every new opportunity that came my way. Despite all this excitement and happiness in my life, I still felt something was missing. All of freshman year, I juggled around what seemed like a million different things to fill this void I had in my heart, but they were all just temporary distractions, not solutions. I realized that life was changing so much so fast, and I was discovering more about myself as a person, figuring out what my purpose is supposed to be. However, there was one thing that wasn’t growing with me on this journey. I knew exactly what it was, but I didn’t want to admit it. This one thing was my long-term relationship.

Deciding to end my long-term relationship after 4 ½ years was the first step in me opening the door for Christ to come in. My relationship had turned into something that lacked the support and passion for life that I so dearly desired. Making the decision to walk away was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. That void I had been looking to fill grew a little wider when I said goodbye to someone who had held such a special place in my heart for so long, even though I knew I made the right decision by doing so. I thought that maybe I could feel fulfilled by my friendships or family, passion for athletics, or a new relationship. Yet again, I was seeking temporary distractions, not solutions. I soon realized that no relationship could satisfy me, only Christ could satisfy me.

I had been intrigued by the Cru posters hanging around campus, so one night I made the decision with a friend to show up and see what it was. It’s hard to explain what really tugged at my heart that night when I showed up to Cru, but when I entered this place filled with people that all came together to worship God and love one another, that void I had been feeling began to fill. That fire I longed to feel in my heart was sparked as I was surrounded by the power of God’s love that was working in me and everyone around me.

I no longer believe that what I need in this life is to seek the approval and love of others to define me, but rather to live my best life in order to honor my Father in heaven. I am reminded by God to live fearlessly and to love myself and others with all my heart. I have faith in God that this life will hold so much joy as I continue to let Him guide my journey. I have never felt stronger and more fulfilled with my life than I have after letting the Lord into my heart and asking him to show me how to take who I am, who I want to be, and what I can do to use me for a purpose greater than myself.

Discovering that my true purpose in this life is to follow God’s guidance to show me what kind of person he needs me to be in this world was my greatest realization yet. I now have direction, purpose, and love beyond explanation to feel and to give to this world.

“For He satisfies the longing soul, and the hungry soul He fills with good things.” Psalm 107:9