Sports have played a big role in my life ever since kindergarten, when I joined my first soccer team. I quickly became a multiple sport athlete, and sports were the most important part of my life in middle school and high school. Another big part of my life we’re my two older brothers, Brad and Charlie. My two older brothers did not always make the best life decisions when I was younger, and my dad always told me I have two great examples of exactly what not to do. Between sports and trying my best not to make dumb decisions like my older brothers had, my life became one of performance. I always tried to do my best in sports, in school, and in making my parents proud. I grew up going to church, knowing all the Bible stories, and that Jesus died for me, but I didn’t truly understand what Jesus did for me. In middle school and high school, I found my value in performing well for my parents and other people. I wanted everyone to love me because I was smart, athletic, fun to be around, and always did the right thing, even though, I wasn’t perfect.

While I might have looked good on the outside in high school, I suffered many internal struggles. I thought I was so high and mighty because I didn’t do drugs or drink alcohol, I didn’t sleep around, and I got good grades. I lived to impress people on the outside, but on the inside, I was broken. I struggled with sexual addiction to porn and masturbation, anger, and pride. I often failed in most aspects of my life, which proved my need for a savior.

I came to college and joined a Bible study. I began to learn what Jesus really did for me. In Jesus dying for me, He took my broken record and wiped my slate clean. I didn’t have to worry about performance anymore. I didn’t have to earn anyone’s approval. In Ephesians 2:8-9, God promises that through faith in Jesus Christ alone we are saved and that we can’t do anything to earn it. Because of Jesus Christ, I don’t have to worry what others think. God sees me as perfect, despite everything I do wrong. This also helped me to begin the process of overcoming my internal struggles. I don’t have to hide who I truly was to impress people anymore. I could finally bring all my issues into the light, so God could help shape me into a better person. Believing in Jesus gave me a clean slate, but I still am a sinner. Ephesians 1:13 says we are promised the Holy Spirit when we put our faith in Jesus. My life isn’t instantly perfect, but by trusting God, believing in Jesus, and relying on the Holy Spirit, I can began to live a transformed life and experience true joy by knowing God is fully satisfied in my performance.