I grew up in a loving, caring household. Even though I was baptized at a young age, as I grew older, I grew further and further from God. I was familiar with the idea of church because my parents modeled and valued it, but I didn’t attend consistently. When I was in sixth grade, my parents asked me if I wanted to attend a Bible study at our local church. The Bible study would have taken place in the evenings, meaning I would have to miss swim practice, so I declined the offer.

Throughout my childhood, I often struggled with feelings of being insufficient. I put all my identity into my athletics and academics. I put a lot of time and effort into being the most successful athlete and student I could be. When I eventually fell short of my goals, I was crushed.

Early during my freshman year of high school, my family and I were invited to visit a new church in town. I did not fully understand the message the pastor was saying, but I was intrigued. After this, we committed to go to church every Sunday. I remember one Sunday service in the middle of my high school years where the pastor gave a gospel presentation, and for the first time it made sense. The pastor explained how it is not by our ability that we can accomplish anything, and that we must put our faith in Christ in everything we do. This resonated with me in a different way than before. Even though I heard it, I am not sure my heart really listened.

When I came to college at Madison, these feelings of insufficiency resurfaced. Would I get the grade I need? How would I compare to my peers? In college, it was almost like my sufficiency was now graded on a curve. This was my reality my freshman year. The Summer after, I started to read the Bible and this time my heart was ready to listen.

Coming into my sophomore year I wanted to find a community centered around Christ and I found that in Badger Cru. One of the things living in this community taught me was 2 Corinthians 3: 4-5, where Paul writes “Such confidence we have through Christ before God. Not that we are competent in ourselves to claim anything for ourselves, but our competence comes from God.”

Jesus aced the test. He set the curve. He never sinned, but chose to die in my place so that I could be made right with God. I can still default back to putting my identity in worldly things, but I know that because of Jesus, when God sees me, He sees someone that is enough.