Growing up I was an over-planner. I planned what I wanted to be when I would grow up from as early as I can remember. I planned what clothes to wear so people would think of me the way I wanted them to. I planned what I would say and do so my peers and family would think highly of me. Even through all this planning, I never found the fulfillment in my relationships or activities that I was looking for.

My arrival to UW turned out to be no different. I planned how I would make friends with my dorm mates and impress my classmates. Yet I was feeling lonelier and more defeated than ever. I didn’t know what would truly satisfy my need to be known and accepted. During my first few semesters on campus I became involved in a Bible study and saw other women living lives filled with joy, peace, and hope, even with all the stress of college. I saw how their lives were not revolving around plans to fit into the world around them, but around God and the grace and truth of the Bible.

I was nervous to lay down my own plans and trust that God had a good and perfect plan for me. However, the more I learned about Jesus and His saving grace, the more I saw that He is good and loving and faithful. The day I decided to surrender my whole life to Christ, acknowledging that I can’t do enough works to earn His favor, but that He loved me enough to die for me, I was filled with a peace and significance that I had never known. Making the decision to have a personal relationship with Jesus and trust in His perfect ways freed me from the bondage of trying to plan my life to fit with cultural expectations. Instead I could trust that no matter the plans ahead of me, if I was following Jesus, He would fill me with the peace and joy I desired.

As I continued my time on campus I saw how God fulfilled every need I had. My career became about Him, not about my own success. My friendships centered on Him and His word, not on my own pride. My free time revolved around knowing and serving Him more, not around pushing my own agenda. He remains faithful through it all. He continues to prompt and lead me into a deeper relationship with Him, and draws me close when I find myself feeling distant. At times, I still stubbornly cling to the plans I have created for myself, but as I surrender my life to Him daily, I am able to see the ways He is at work around me. God is continually showing me that He is trustworthy and leading me far beyond I ever thought possible.